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Noticing red flags is a trend now. Just open Instagram, you’ll find relationship gurus giving you pointers, telling you this is also a red flag that is also a red flag but should we believe all that they are telling us.
I don’t think so, there might be some actions of your partner that may seem like a red flag(warning signs) but that can be a commitment fear too.
The best way to notice a red flag in someone is through an intricate evaluation of their behavior. Finding reasons behind their behavior or actions will lead you to decide whether they are a walking red flag or just fear they don’t know how to face.
We are here to tell you, what are silent red flags in a relationship and signs that you may have noticed but ignored. Let’s dive deep into understanding those 9 warning signs that you should not ignore in any case.
What do we mean by red flags?
As per psychology, warning signs or red flags in someone indicates the person is manipulative, they use mind tactics and words to keep you under their love spell. They are usually controlling, have low self-esteem, and they may have narcissistic nature.
Failing to understand what is manipulation in a relationship causes heartbreak in the future. And ignoring silent red flags in a relationship is the biggest mistake one makes.
We in fact hype their good quality just to distract from the fact that they are actually a walking red flag.
If you have to put your happiness and desires at bay, that means the relationship is not going to do any good anytime. Sure, there are compromises and sacrifices in relationships but if you’re losing yourself completely, you should call it quits, put a break on such unhealthy relationships.
Let’s understand why we ignore these early warning signs.
Why Do We Ignore Early Red Flags in Relationships?
In your eyes, your relationship might be perfect and there’s love. However, people who care about your mental health and life, will tell you that there is something wrong in your relationship, your partner is not right and they don’t treat you the way you deserve to be treated.
In the early stage, it may not seem to be an issue to you but, keeping up with an unhealthy relationship will gradually become the root cause of pain and suffering.
1. We ignore red flags because we think we can change the person with our love and discipline them to be a nice person
2. We feel that this person is our soulmate and that since God created them specifically for us, we shouldn't leave them even if they have imperfections.
3. We are too emotionally attached to this person, thus the idea of parting ways with them makes us anxious, uneasy and shakes our heart.
4. Or maybe we are inherently naive, we care too much that’s why we get caught in worry about how they will survive without us.
5. We believe that the universe has brought us together to lead a life together and that you should stick together.
There can be many more reasons why you choose to ignore their bad behavior or keep up with the silent flags in your relationship.
Don’t ignore these 9 silent red flags in your relationship.
1. Crazy Exes & Terrible Break-up Stories
The pattern toxic people follow is bad-mouthing their ex to gain empathy and a way to get into your heart. They portray their ex as an awful person, such as a narcissist or demeaning, toxic individuals but in truth, they are the one.
It’s a psychological tactic to persuade you to save them from their “bad” ex-partners.
Never believe someone blindly until there’s any proof which you sadly may never find because they come prepared.
2. Lack of Meaningful Conversation
In a relationship, communication is a game changer. And toxic people refrain from lively discussions and usually converse in one-liners.
They use quotes and phrases hardly in their own words.
Never having a genuine conversation about how they feel about you is a warning sign.
I am going to sound harsh, but whether you see it as a red flag or not, either way, it means they are with you because you satisfy their needs. When you fall in love with someone, you don’t hesitate to share your feelings, you either reflect that in actions by doing something special, surprise them, or talk for hours and hours.
3. Lack of Emotional Intimacy
Emotional intimacy is a reciprocal exchange of open and honest talk about deepest thoughts, feelings, and fears, and complicated emotions, without criticizing each other.
They have time to get physical with you but give you excuses when you try to get intimate emotionally. Whenever you think it’s time to connect on a deeper level, it’s never the right time for them.
They are just manipulating you for their selfish needs.If you feel insecure, it only means one thing: that deep down you don’t trust your partner. And having a brief conversation can clear the air.
Trust issues arise when the subconscious mind refuses to ignore their behavior that this person cannot be trusted. And that happens when on a deeper level you realize that they are not loyal with you.5. Emotional Unavailability
If you want to love and be loved, you can’t have that from an emotionally unavailable person.
Usually, casual and toxic people behave like this and show up when they need you.
They basically want to avoid sharing particulars about their future plans and life. So by being unavailable they easily dismiss giving the relationship a title or simply disregard commitment.
Why waste time after someone who doesn’t care about your emotions and disregards your affection and care towards them.
Probably this is the most hurtful thing someone would do to you.
But you are the one to decide what’s fair to you and what’s not.
If your partner makes fun of you, either in private or in public, stop them right there. Don’t let anyone treat you like trash. Not everything is to be taken lightly or as a joke and let it go.
Everyone has their own thing, if your thoughts and values and it’s not necessary people in a relationship cannot have different ideologies.
A narcissist never feels guilty for their behavior, forget that they will ever apologize to you, and never do this again. You should throw this person out of your life.
Manipulators bombard their victims with love bombs as well as lies to keep you stuck with them.
And when they suspect that you’re going to leave him/her or that you don’t care anymore, they scheme to make you fall for their fake love and lie again.
They will use your emotions against you to keep you confused and in fear of the consequences of leaving them. They may say things to keep you in an impression that you’re guilty of hurting them.
They are usually selfish people who will go to any lengths to get what they want, so, beware of those. They are the ones who don’t hesitate to exploit and abuse their partner.
8. Lack of Empathy or Rude Behavior
Honestly, can you be with someone who lacks empathy?
Their rude behavior and not caring how you’re feeling are a concern.
This kind of person mostly believes that they are always right.
9. Ghosting and Reappearing
Some people are experts at finding excuses and lies, and these geniuses are called pathological liars. They disappear and reappear in your life every now and then. The stupidest thing a naive person can do is let them in again. I read an article where this behavior is defined as submarining. Submarining is the act of dating someone for a while, disappearing without warning, and then reappearing, also without warning.
They’ll act as if nothing happened, they disappeared because there was something else more important than the connection between them.
Or they may talk emotionally, that they have realized that this connection has a future, they wanted a gap to realize that, and they are now back for good.
Never trust this person, they are going to do the same in future and will keep hurting you.